Hiking · Humor · Personal

Fuck You, Cheryl Strayed

I read “Wild”. I watched the movie and cried with Reese when she made it to the end of the PCH. I proudly went to REI and plunked down $100 of money I don’t have and bought a super cool badass pair of hiking boots with which to start my journey to enlightenment via the Inca Trail. But no one told me that:

Boots are the worst.

I bought these so far in advance of my trip thinking “Oh I’ll be SO prepared and break them in now”. They’re super cute (yet appropriately rugged-looking for trailhead street cred), waterproof, good treads, all-around awesome and exactly what I needed. Left super happy and ready to take on the world!

HOWEVER: No one tells you that if you’re not used to wearing high-top shoes, you will feel as though you’re trying to climb Mount Everest wearing rollerblades.

The first time I wore my new boots it felt like I was in double plaster casts and learning to walk all over again. “Ankle Support” translates to: “You will not be able to fucking move.” It was kind of embarrassing, too. There I was, looking 100% the part of serious hiker on a relatively mild trail/incline and I was having to go up sideways, as in, feet perpendicular to the trail- like how you go back up a mountain on skis- because I couldn’t get used to not being able to angle forward.

Eventually, after an hour or so, I sort of got used to the feeling. But lemme tell ya, it’s weird. And if you’re not used to it, maybe walk in your boots on flat surfaces first so you don’t look like a total idiot on the trail like yours truly.

UGH.

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